It's really strange and frightening how I can go from having suicidal thoughts one day to being fine the next day.

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I gave up today. I lost the fight ( Read more... )

I know facing the truth is fucking hard to do, but it does set you free at the end ( Read more... )

Bad manic moment passed.

thanks to friends and a dad who live in different time zones, which permits them to call me during the witching hour.

i did a blind self portrait. it's me and not me all in one.

going to sleep now.

enjoy the songs i posted everyone.

edit: i flushed my sleeping pills in the toilet.

I've been crying for the past 20 minutes non stop. I want it to end. When will this end?
I keep thinking about taking my entire sleeping pills. I don't want to think about this anymore. When can I go back to being normal Hania? Where is she? What happened to her? Did she ever exist? I don't know anymore.

An old friend of mine from Lisbon Portugal wrote the following description about me in an exchange of emails:

You manage that very difficult balance between the little girl and the big, big person in you like nobody I know.

Someone told me that people with bipolar disorder behave similarly to children at times.

I kinda see it. I get really excited ( Read more... )

I am annoyed with people who tell me to take my medicine and do my exercises when I'm already doing that from Day 1. I've been pretty transparent about new lifestyle, my disorder and my medications ( Read more... )

Ever since I have openly admitted that I am in the process of being diagnosed for a mental disorder, I have had many people question my decision to discuss every thing so openly on Facebook and my Livejournal account. Many people have told me that there is no need to share all this information.

Then why do we treat people suffering from physical ( Read more... )

I'm trying really hard not to hide behind my manic/hypomanic episode ( Read more... )

I am cleaning my room and listening to music at this moment.

Finally after several weeks, I feel at peace. I love my life, my friends and my family. Prioritize your health and your loved ones. Everything else can wait. Nothing is permanent in life, the good and the bad. This too shall pass. Live in the present moment.